Things Are (Still) Not As They Seem

I have lost track of the amount of times I have read that phrase during the course of this study, and how I have interpreted it with my mind, but not fully with my heart. Over the past two weeks, especially with the reading chapters four and five, I have been trying to look at the world through another set of lenses, so to speak, and actually see things not as they are, but how God intended them to be.

When I first started at Berkeley, I was informed by a number of people that the armies of Satan reside in Berkeley, and it was incredibly hard to be a Christian with Satan’s headquarters right around the corner. This past month, however, has allowed me to see the Kingdom, living and active, here on my campus. Walking to class on the first day of school, I walked by a group of people praying, praying for the Christians on campus that we could be a light, and demonstrate His love to our fellow classmates, professors, and the community at large. I was humbled. Each time I walk through campus there are more and more Christian groups, encouraging people to come, and learn about Christ. Today, there were people worshipping beside a fountain, singing to the King for who He is. Again, I was humbled.

Later on this afternoon, I sat in a lecture for my early American women writer’s class, and we discussed the reading for the day, the trial of Ann Hutchinson. Ann was exiled from the Massachusetts colony for publicly declaring before the Puritan Church that she had had an encounter with the Living God, and it was not because of the good works that she had done, but because of the grace he bestowed to her. She declared that she did not want the grace of the church bestowed upon her, but she desired to be pointed to Christ, for all she needed was Christ.

Even in 1697, things were not as they seemed. Reading through Revelation, walking through campus and seeing and hearing how the Kingdom is at hand, I was reminded of how small I really am in comparison to how great He is. I’ve lost my first love time and again, and yet I am too proud to admit it because I want people to think I’m perfect, I want to think I’m perfect and totally capable to working my way to the top. My inability to recognize when I need to depend on Him has caused me to see the world through cynical lenses, and yet He still draws me near to Him, he reveals himself to me every time I walk through Sproul plaza. He calls me to wake up, to strengthen what remains, and live each day like the Lamb, breaking my alabaster jar, and lay my life down in self-giving, sacrificial servant love.

My prayer is this, that I would continue to allow the Lord to work on my heart, to continue to show me just how unseemly things in this world are, and above else, not to look for riches, but in everything I do, be pointed to Christ.